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  • Writer's pictureKanilina Clerge, LMFT

Maintaining Friendships with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD): Tips for Success

Friendships are a source of joy, support, and connection in our lives. But for those with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), the path to cultivating and preserving these relationships can be filled with challenges. BPD often brings intense emotions, impulsive behaviors, and mood swings. Despite these obstacles, there's hope! With the right strategies and support, you can not only nurture friendships but also thrive with BPD. In this blog post, we'll explore some uplifting advice and practical tips for maintaining friendships when you have BPD.



1. Seek Treatment:

  • Remember that seeking professional help is a brave and empowering step towards a brighter future. Therapy, particularly Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), can work wonders in managing BPD symptoms and building healthier relationships.

  • Medication, if recommended by a mental health professional, can provide the stability you need to take control of your life.


2. Cultivate Self-Awareness:

  • Embrace the journey of self-discovery. Understanding your BPD symptoms, triggers, and behaviors is a powerful tool. Self-awareness will help you navigate challenging moments and make positive choices.


3. Communicate Openly:

  • Your friends can be your pillars of strength. Open up about your BPD journey with them. Share what you've learned about your condition and how they can offer support.

  • Effective communication is the cornerstone of lasting friendships.


4. Set Boundaries with Confidence:

  • Boundaries are your shield and your sanctuary. Establish clear boundaries and communicate them to your friends. This not only protects your well-being but also helps your friends understand your needs.


5. Master Emotional Regulation:

  • You have the ability to control your emotions in healthy ways. Practice mindfulness, deep breathing, and grounding exercises to manage emotional intensity. You've got this!


6. Tame Impulses:

  • Your impulses don't define you. When faced with impulsive urges, remember that you have the power to pause, reflect, and make choices that align with your long-term goals.


7. Apologize and Make Amends:

  • Mistakes are part of life's journey. When you slip up and it affects your friends, apologize sincerely. Taking responsibility and making amends are signs of growth and resilience.


8. Prioritize Self-Care:

  • You deserve self-care. Prioritize sleep, nourishing meals, regular exercise, and stress management. Taking care of yourself is a vital act of self-love.


9. Build a Support Network:

  • Surround yourself with friends who understand, empathize, and stand by your side. Seek out those who are willing to learn about BPD and support you on your unique path.


10. Embrace Therapy's Transformative Power:

  • Therapy is your ally in this journey. Attend sessions regularly and actively engage in the process. Your therapist will empower you with coping strategies and improve your interpersonal skills.


11. Master Conflict Resolution:

  • Conflict is an opportunity for growth. Learn effective conflict resolution skills to navigate disagreements in a constructive and positive manner.


12. Mindful Socializing:

  • Socializing can be your playground for personal growth. Stay mindful of your emotions and their influence. If emotions intensify, take a step back and practice self-regulation techniques.


13. Choose Positive Relationships:

  • Your circle should radiate positivity and support your recovery. It's okay to distance yourself from toxic or triggering friendships; you deserve a nurturing environment.



Nurturing friendships while living with BPD is a remarkable achievement. Remember that your journey is unique, and setbacks are stepping stones to success. Be patient with yourself and your friends, and celebrate each small victory in maintaining meaningful and healthy connections. Surrounding yourself with a supportive network can be an invaluable part of your journey to recovery. With professional help, self-awareness, and these practical tips, you can not only maintain but also thrive in friendships that enrich your life and contribute to your well-being. Your future is bright, and you are stronger than you know!

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